" when god gave me more than I could handle ... "
The Sunday morning of 2 July 2017, our life were completely turned upside down, when our eldest daughter Lumé suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. a Part of me died with her that morning.
When unimaginable tragedy of losing your child strip you naked to the very core of your human being, at your lowest, and in the most deepest valley of sorrow - when you have no where to turn and have no answers - What do you do? When life as you knew it, and planning your future as you did, when how we are wired to think about life turned out not to be the case at all, and bring you to a full-stop with not one sentence to continue your path - What do you do?
Walking this unwanted road is a journey full of unknown feelings that surprise, frighten and embarrass you, showing up at times or in ways you don't expect. You are broken, end of story.
Hardest thing is that you are forced to confront an extremely painful and stressful paradox. While facing the situation in which we must deal both with the grief caused by our child's death and with our inherent need to continue to live our own lives as fully as possible. You want to be free from this overwhelming pain and yet need it as a reminder of your child.
There is no greater pain or suffering than the loss of a child. Nothing prepares you for this and it doesn't feel real. Grief also has no expiry date... Ever.
People say: "God will never give you more than you can handle." I would say, that is not true. God do give more than you can handle. The difference is:
Surrendering to God is the key to peace in our darkest hours. On this journey so far we have experienced that only God have the answers and turning to Him,
I have found, give you the comfort you need to get through unbearable situations.
Ronel
